The basis of many divorces is the bizarre explanation: “I have nothing to tell .” Psychologists say that, however, there are no people who have not what to say to each other. There is only the lack of communication. You want to say, but you come to shut up. Do not you realize that sometimes silence is not golden?
Here are some simple rules for those who do not want to reach the critical point, you do not have what to say.
Good morning!
Sometimes partners are striving to give the impression that they do not have what to tell each other. When awake, he looks at the ceiling, she looks through the window and, ultimately, he quickly makes himself coffee. And later, she makes hers.
The golden rule requires that the second raised tell the first traditional “good morning”. If the other is not ill-mannered, will respond with the same words and inevitably will ask, “How did you sleep?”.
If the other partner answer something about how he or she slept, they begin communicating and it can be considered that they started the day on the right.
I thought of you today
Nothing more beautiful for the second coming from work, but to respond with “I thought of you today”, when asked, or even just, how the day went at work.
A response like “we recorded 400 bills” ends any communication from the start, because the other spouse is never interested in other’ s bills.
Instead, answering the question immediately leads personified “in what aspect you think?”. Do not worry, the answer does not bind to anything complicated. Simply something like “I knew you are going to the hairdresser and I wanted to know how you look.” It is exactly the right thing. Communication between spouses began.
I trust you
Inevitably, justified or not, smolder suspicion can appear between spouses. In this situation, nothing cuts communication channels than being sulky. Whether you’re sincere or not, the simple statement “I trust you” unties the horse’ s fence. Just use this expression.
Trusting your partner makes the other tell at least 1% of one’s heart. Maybe not so much, maybe he will say nothing but what exactly is in the heart, but it does not matter. It matters to see how communication is saved. Feel safe to say more.
Communicating today, tomorrow communicating, you feel that despite clenching, yet not cut all the bridges.
I’m sorry for what I did
Whether a big or a small fault, just the confidence, “I’m sorry for what I did” approaches him on the second step. An explanation starts with expressing regret the partner undertakes to console him on the other, to assuage sorrow, even if time can be painful for him.
It is much more practical to learn that your only regret is that attention should be sorry, to go on the defensive and feel that any attempt at communication collapses.
What a surprise! Since when I haven’t eaten stuffed peppers
Even if you cannot stand stuffed peppers a safe compliment goes to the heart. Perhaps you made stuffed peppers in trouble, he knew that you do not like. Especially, kind words disarms.
With a line like “stuffed peppers again?” Perhaps you will release it once the nasty food, but the moments of silence that will follow inevitably will be worse.
Sometimes a moment of silence, suddenly makes you discover that you and wife do not have what to say to each other.
How good you thought to take a football ticket for me!
When men talk among themselves about football, and women with each other about the seamstress, having arrived home spouses have not any subject of communication.
But it is worth to do so much sacrifice on his part as to inquire how her dress will look to the future party? or so much sacrifice from her part to obey him for failure to strike from 11 meters.
About dresses he is not interested, not interested in her shot, but you both care about that after exceeding this extemporal unpleasant topic tomorrow you will have communication on any topic.
Good night!
If one spouse goes to bed immediately and the other finds him sleeping when he comes, because he finished the TV show, it is clear that there is no communication between them.
And how easy it was to get out of this trap with a clenched sure about the first one who goes to bed, or gives the first signs of fatigue: “good night”.
It’s a great opportunity because, awakening, you will feel the need for a “good morning” which is incentive in everyday communication. Have a happy life!
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